I think it is much easier to deal with the first three stages of grief than the fourth. Denial, anger, and bargaining are passed through when the mour...er realizes death is implacable. It can’t be denied, anger is impotent, and there is really no bargain that can be struck. But depression settles in and won’t let go. It was what led me to alcoholism. The constant thinking ... hammering in my skull ... about things I couldn’t change. My own impotence. And drinking only drove me further inside. I. She fixed herself dinner and as it was Thursday settled down to watch the Cosby show and Cheers. Just after Cheers, she heard the hum of machinery next door and her lights flickered. Chasity got up off the couch and peeked out the window. The lights were on in the basement of Doctor Von Horne's, flickering again as if his machines were drawing large amounts of power.Chasity couldn't take it anymore. She had to know what was going on over there. It was dark outside and there weren't any street. She’s facing Diana. “I’ll let you two do some more dancing. It’s time for me to go home.” She looks at the floor for her clothes, but Diana has hid them all under the couch while she was refilling her glass. “Inga’s a bit tipsy and laughs. “All right, where are my clothes.”Diana is laughing and walks up to her. “I’ll get them for you but you just have to give me a kiss first. That’s customary for strippers after a dance.”“Really? You’re not just teasing me are you? How would you know?” Diana. " Bill said stomping inside the outer door.I expected to look around and see people on the street staring at me, or my pants wet or something. I looked at myself and my clothes weren't askew. Yes I was sound asleep out there with 3 emptys beside me, but I was on MY porch on a hot afternoon after work. No one was on the street. What was the big deal?I put together my empties and the bucket with 2 cold ones left and went inside.Bill was sitting in the easy chair staring at the TV news. I decided.
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