I can smell her; a mixture of flower scents, coconut and pepper. She looms over me, blotting out the light, hiding me in the shadows. Maybe I’ll be ...afe here.“Hi.” I don’t move; stay fixed and rigid before her.“I’m Anita.” My head bowed, eyes cast down.“Are you on your own? I’m here with Grant; that’s my husband, on the sun lounger, by the pool. We …” She’s prattling, filling the void, not allowing my silence to terminate our relationship. The words flow on, washing over me but now her hand is. With you two especially because I never get that paranoid feeling I get sometimes when I’m not with the ones I love. The same with alcohol. Occasionally but not daily is great for loosening up bodies and tongues. But when you get into chemistry, cocaine or heroin or Percocet or whatever, it’s never good except to numb. They’re poison. They weaken you and transform you into…nothing.’ ‘What are you talking about?’ Maya replied. ‘Have you even tried it?’ ‘Sure, when I got injured, twisting my. We watched Brad and Barb screw on the beach. Then Brad and Barb watched us screw. Jake and I went back to the cottage and fucked him again. I don’t know how many times your brother fucked Barbara. How’s that for a fun afternoon in the woods? Now I’m the one using the word ‘fuck’ too much.”“Wow, Mom. I knew he would be after you, and you might sneak off and have a little fun, but this ... I would never have expected. So what are you and Brad going to do? Have a two-week fling swapping partners,. ’ In his own right? Does that mean most of what sets him apart derives from his relationship with me? ‘I’m sure most of you know Jeff finished college much quicker than most.’ Quicker than most? He did in less than two years what typically takes eight or nine years. In the middle of a message that sounded laudatory, my father was trying to downplay Jeff’s accomplishments. I cast a worried glance at Jeff. He was grinning. Jeff had told my father he didn’t need to refer to him with so much as a.
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