Or I sometimes have this urge to get out of my car and smash the face of the man who almost drove into me. I sometimes want to kill someone, lately ev...n someone I thought I loved..."She started. I continued."But you see, Elaine: I did not and I don't. Needs can be suppressed, honey, urges can be overruled. It is called restraint, civilization, decency... love..."Her eyes now begged. Her head sunk between her shoulders. She looked so much younger, a child. Her voice rose into a whining."But I. "And use that new digital camera you were bragging about to take a photo of you in them. You can give me it when I see you next to prove you're telling the truth."The line went dead.When he got home from work that evening he said 'Hi' to his girlfriend and made the excuse that he was bursting for the toilet and hurried upstairs. Grabbing the camera he dropped his trousers and held up his shirt tails and took the picture she'd demanded.Shrugging out of the shirt and out of the trousers he was. .. every so carefully I slipped out of bed and crept out of the house. The Johnson's lived a couple of blocks away and in no time I was standing on their front stoop. Miriam opened the door and let me in. My second shock of the day was when she hugged me and thanked me for coming over. I noticed the television was off and I asked her what we were going to do. She smiled at me. I don't know if she was laughing at my ignorance or smiling because she knew she was going to teach me something. I couldn't help being tense when I was so close to April and I no longer knew exactly where we stood."So now what?" I asked."Well, we can talk if you want. Or we can just sit here for a while. Or I can give you some space if it'll help. It's up to you really." Could you stop being so nice about this? I don't really know how to deal with it."April hugged me tighter. "Nope, I'm gonna be as nice as I want, and there's nothing you can do about it." Even though you know how messed up I am? And that.
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