It was the following morning before I was allowed to washthe paint off.The doorbell rang. I knew it wasn't Shane as he was nowaway on holiday with his...parents for two weeks. I wasupstairs tidying Emily's room. A few minutes later I hearda call from downstairs.'Lucy, get down here now.' It was Maggie's voice.I quickly left the room and went down the stairs. In thehallway were Maggie, Emily and Sadie with the latterholding a case. I thought oh no she is going to stay, butit was worse than that as. I would even send private messages to guys, and sometimes i didn’t get any response, or a fuck off fag, and every once in a while i’d get a response from someone who actually chatted with me, who would be willing to get of sexting….. seemed most guy were either not from NY or just to scared to meet up for some good head in a public setting…. til finally one day someone contacted me privately…. he claimed to be a well hung black man from NY, who wanted to take me up on my offer… he wanted to. Not until I die.All the while I felt the charm she had on me slacken, bit by bit. It gave me room to breathe. I relaxed and let myself slide a little farther out of the Heart of Stone. Dispassionate calm can be a useful frame of mind, but it does not make for a compelling performance.I played for hours, and by the end of it I felt like myself again. By which I mean I could look at Felurian with no more reaction than you might normally feel, looking at the most beautiful woman in the world.I can. Man, I liked the sound of "WE THREE!" in that sentence. I wanted that more than anything else. We three ... warmed my heart.So, as with the bedding, even though I'd used the kitchen stuff after June and Katie left for a new life without me, I didn't need constant reminder of June. Although, I'd thought frequently about Katie and how things were for her.She'd accepted me instantly, just like Michelle had done. Perhaps some day, I'd see or hear about her. By then too I figured, the little.
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