Shower, breakfast and coffee, then mail. Last night, I drank myself silly from the loneliness so the pounding hangover was making a big scene in my he...d. It was something I'm used to though. Drinking myself away when I couldn't find a date on a Friday night, not even a quick suck and fuck with the local bar flies despite the fact that it was my 20th birthday today, like all other birthdays...It was not like I'm completely repulsive. I had to say that I am a pretty decent, average guy. Brown. But that Sunday afternoon he fellt an odd sense of pride when he discovered his sons new masturbatory practice. Bobby was jerking his little noggin to a Strickland propane calendar. In any ther other household they would have said that boy ain't right, but Hank knew that Bobby finally gave in to his odorless misstress propane. He got a little scared too, the boy gave in a bit too much to propane, he himself had been in the propane buisness all his life and his mind was always fixated on propane. It was unlocked, exactly as I was expecting. I saved my number in it and gave myself a missed call.When I reached the Khanna house, Neha came to the door in a bathrobe. She invited me in, saying the whole family had gone to attend a function. It was getting slightly dark outside when I stepped in.Neha had changed into shorts and a T-shirt, showing her belly button.I said, “You look hot”.She walked into a side room, smiling. She must not have been more than 23 or 24 years old, I guessed. I was. If you refuse to let them have any effect on your emotions, deny them altogether, then they cease to exist. Leaving you a cold yet stable individual.Its addicting to cease emotions. It makes life much easier but becomes a horrible habit. I know that eventually it will lead to falling out of love, losing the spark that once moistened my panties on contact. So I am left with the decision of which is worse? Feeling everything, powerfully, to the point of breaking myself, or feeling absolutely.
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