The beer is cheap—hell you could get high on the beer fumes that come out of the woodwork.So last Friday we are letting the first couple of cold dra...ts slide down our throats when Joe nudges me. "Check out the blonde," he says.I look. She is in her mid thirties, a few pounds overweight. Tight skirt, no bra. Butt overflows the barstool a bit. Looks like she's been in the Vee Jay for a while.Joe is no slouch with women. "Gimme a few minutes," he says, and slides down the bar to where the blonde. “Mom, should we learn a routine, or just wing it?” I asked, a bit unsure of what to do next.“Charles, I would suggest a routine, but do whatever works for you. Don’t overthink it? You both love to dance, you both love each other — so just dance.”Claire and I couldn’t believe what my mother just said in front of us. Claire was blushing profusely, and I went up to my mother and said, “You need to go to your room. You are grounded for one hour and then we expect you to come down here and apologize. I know a story that tops it all.New York has this peculiar institution known as the Sanitation Court. That's where you report if you get a summons for littering or maybe if you're a contractor who's tried to sneak a couple of bags of renovation debris into the regular municipal trash pickup. And it's where young judges start their career, and where old judges end up when they're thrown on the trash heap. A sad place, and one best avoided, no doubt. Well, one day it was my turn to find out what. I was ready to give what I thought was a salesman a bit of my mind for interrupting my own play-acting. I swung the door open but I didn’t protest, as it was the smiling face of Jim. “I’ve come to clean your windows Jenny,” he said. Looking at my legs as my robe was very short. I couldn’t speak for a few seconds; the man I was just thinking about when I was masturbating was here right in front of me. Then without considering the consequences I answered him, “Yes of course, but its midday and I.
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